The devastation is everywhere. Hurricane Milton has just torn through communities, compounding the anguish left behind by Hurricane Helene only weeks prior. As if nature’s fury wasn’t enough, the world recently marked a somber anniversary—the attacks against Israel one year ago, where 1,200 men, women, and children, including 46 Americans and citizens from more than 30 nations, fell victim to violence by Hamas.
Amid all this chaos, life inexplicably goes on. We’re expected to focus on everyday tasks—math assignments, work deadlines, grocery lists—while tragedy unfolds all around us. And that’s just from the perspective of a bystander, someone not directly affected. Yet, even when we don’t know the people involved, the grief feels tangible. There’s a silent cry that arises from witnessing others lose their homes, their memories, and even their lives.
We cannot, and should not, ignore these feelings. We must face the emotions head-on, even when the conversations are uncomfortable. Especially then.
A friend recently confided that loss was such a normal part of life in her large family growing up that she never truly learned how to process it. The same sentiment echoes across many voices I’ve heard—it’s alarming how often loss is treated as “normal.” We must do better. Loss may be inevitable, but it shouldn’t be dismissed as just another part of life. We need tools and approaches to navigate these difficult transitions because, inevitably, there will be many.
Addressing transitions requires looking at the whole picture—including the emotional aspects. It’s not just about moving on or “getting over it.” It’s about dealing with the emotions that surface, whatever form they may take.
Processing grief doesn’t necessarily mean talking it out, though that can be helpful. Expression can take many forms—journaling, walking, painting, exercising—anything that helps release the pent-up emotions in a constructive way. The key here is to focus on a healthy release.
Anger, for instance, is often associated with negativity. But anger is just an emotion, no different than sadness or joy. It’s how we manage and express it that makes the difference. Hitting someone is clearly not okay. Hitting objects out of frustration can sometimes be problematic. Yet, hitting a punching bag at the gym or participating in activities like “rage rooms”—where people pay to break things as a form of stress relief—are examples of healthy outlets. It’s a recognition that the emotions need to go somewhere, and doing it in a structured environment is far better than exploding in the privacy of your kitchen.
So, why are we so reluctant to provide emotional outlets? Why do we push people to just “move on”? The truth is, grief and trauma don’t adhere to timelines or social norms. Suppressing the feelings only delays the inevitable reckoning. The emotions will surface at some point; it’s better to address them with intention and care.
We must also acknowledge that grief isn’t linear. There isn’t a prescribed path to follow. Some days will feel lighter than others, while some will feel impossibly heavy. This variability is normal and should be part of any dialogue about coping.
To support ourselves and each other through these times, let’s establish routines that help. These might include mindfulness practices, physical exercise, creative expression, or even quiet reflection. The important thing is to validate each person’s way of navigating their own emotional landscape.
Ultimately, finding ways to cope with devastation, whether from natural disasters or human-made tragedies, is an ongoing process. It’s okay to admit that these events affect us, that they challenge our ability to stay grounded. What matters is how we respond to these challenges—not by pretending life hasn’t been disrupted, but by finding ways to adapt and heal despite the chaos.
If we normalize anything, let it be a culture that encourages healthy grieving and emotional expression. We can build a world where loss is acknowledged, and resilience is celebrated, not because we are “strong,” but because we are human.
Meet the expert:
Samantha is a Psychologist, Speaker, Best Selling Author, and Host of The Be Ruthless Show, a podcast dedicated to Making Noise and Breaking Stigmas.
Samantha is also the Proud Founder of Griefhab, rehab for grief, a 24/7 community open to anyone who has experienced a loss.
Samantha’s mission is to change the way the world views both grief and mental illness, so people can get the help they deserve without the fear of judgment, labels, and repercussions.
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